Have you ever been in an abusive relationship? Do you feel your partner is a narcissist, and he/she has dumped you for no good reasons? Probably yes. Many people experience this issue while being in relationships. Let’s explore how all this process works and find out what happens when you ignore a narcissist who dumped you.
Who is A Narcissist?
A narcissist is a kind of personality disorder in which people believe they are superior to others. Narcissist people have an inflated sense of their importance, and they lack empathy for others. Narcissists are a slightly different breed.
No matter who the other person is, narcissists always value themselves and put themselves above every other person and every other thing. They have very high self-esteem, due to which they experience problems in their relationships.
When a person gets in a relationship with a narcissist, it becomes challenging for him to deal with them. Even after putting sincere efforts into building a strong bond with a narcissist, you might fail in succeeding.
A narcissist may dump you no matter how sincere, loyal, or honest you were. Resultantly, what happens is that the person gets fed up and starts ignoring the narcissist.
Why Narcissists Make Others Feel Bad?
Making others feel bad is a part of narcissism feed because this makes them feel superior to others. They will do everything to dump you, put you down so that they can convince themselves that they are far better than you.
So, don’t be down. Build your confidence and gather some courage to move on.
Is it Easy to Ignore a Narcissist?
A quick answer is No; it’s not easy to ignore a narcissist even if he/she has dumped you. It is exceptionally challenging. Also, the outcome doesn’t need to be necessarily positive.
It takes a lot more strength to show guts and hold your ground against someone who is consistently trying to bring you down.
But sometimes you have to takes such harsh steps for your peace and prosperity. You have to gather the courage to take this bold step. If somehow you have succeeded in dumping a narcissist, pat yourself on the back.
Once a narcissist has dumped you, and you are attempting to ignore them, you will have to be patient as it will be quite challenging. No matter how intolerable they are, or whatever height of their wrath is, you have to stand firm in ignoring them.
Why Should You Ignore A Narcissist?
Getting into a relationship with a narcissist is harmful to your overall wellbeing. Narcissists have redeeming qualities and are extremely skillful in masking their toxicity. Staying with them will only enhance the pain and will never bring about peace.
Nothing hurts a narcissist more than being ignored and that too by their favorite persons. It makes them feel insignificant, undervalued, and meaningless. This is their biggest fear. However, your objective of ignoring a narcissist shouldn’t be to hurt them or to elicit a response. Instead, your purpose should be to stay away from them for your peace and prosperity.
You have to understand that ignoring them is better for your peace. It might seem hard but believe me, your life will be much better without them. Do your best to avoid them.
Remember, you are doing all this for your betterment and eternal peace. Otherwise, your future happiness will be at stake. You deserve much better than anything that a narcissist can ever offer you.
Don’t feel bad as you have avoided a relationship that could ruin your peace and shatter your confidence. If you prolong your relationship with a narcissist, you will experience severe depression and anxiety, which won’t let you enjoy your life. A narcissist will make you feel worthless and unlovable.
How to Ignore A Narcissist?
There can be two different methods of ignoring a narcissist. These are;
- The Grey Rock Method
- No Contact Method
The grey rock method encourages victims to make their life seem boring, dull, and motionless and hope that the narcissist will eventually get bored and leave the victim alone.
No contact method encourages cutting down all sorts of communication with the narcissist. If this cannot be done, then the least you have to do is avoid reacting to things that trigger you. You have to make the narcissist believe that they are no longer the center of attention of your world.
What Happens When You Ignore a Narcissist Who Dumped You?
You might be wondering what would happen when I ignore a narcissist who dumped me? Will they get confused? Will they come back, or will they start ignoring me back? So, let’s dive in and explore in detail what would happen when you ignore a narcissist?
They Will Start Ignoring You Back
The first thing that may happen as a result of ignoring your narcissist partner is that they may start ignoring you back because they don’t care about your feelings. This is a control tactic that makes them feel like the power is in their hands. They call it the defense mechanism because it prevents them from appearing weak or vulnerable.
Mostly, they don’t care about the other person or relationship. All they want is that they should not be undervalued or called weak, no matter what they are saying or doing to their partners.
So, what would happen in this case is that you will be ignoring them, and they will be ignoring you back. At this point, you have to stay calm and control your temper. Never shout back. Control your feelings and talk politely to sort out the matters.
Your objective is to make them realize that you are a person with different attributes, and you cannot allow them to take control of your feelings. However, this process won’t last for too long.
They Will Try to Reach You Out
A time will come when your partner will realize that he/she has no power to control you. Resultantly, they might lash out in anger, which indicates that they have gone crazy now. When they realize that they lack control over you, they will try to reach you out.
When narcissists see that things are getting out of control, and their favorite person ignores them, they may show fake kindness and wish to be on good terms with you again.
They might become desperate to get a response from you and would be willing to do anything to get you back. At this stage, the narcissist may show you a softer side of themselves, might manipulate you, or act out of character so that they can get in touch with you.
They might send a text message to get your attention, might seek forgiveness, and would guarantee that they won’t do it again. They would assure that they won’t do anything which would make you ignore them again.
However, you have to be careful at this stage. If they start telling you that they missed you and loved everything about you, you have to be cautious because it might be a major red flag in your relationship with them.
These responses might seem sweet initially, but they might be a trap. You might have to step back and observe things critically. Otherwise, things would become much more difficult for you in the future.
They Become Aggressive
As time passes on and the narcissists continue to fail in all sorts of manipulation tactics, they will start experiencing pain and anxiety. It may make them overwhelmed.
On the other hand, you may feel relieved and may become at ease with passing time because you have succeeded in getting out of an abusive relationship. You might think that the worst things are over, and it’s all peace now.
Sadly, it’s not true. Be ready for more surprises to come. With time narcissists will learn that their current approach isn’t working, and they have to try something new. They can never see you at ease because they aren’t at peace themselves.
Up till now, if they were kind, now they will become aggressive. So, get ready to face their anger. They might start insulting you and may threaten you to get your attention. Their primary objective is to get your attention, and now they are using force to do so.
Bear in mind that your response or getting back to them is a win for them and a loss for you. Be firm in holding your ground and not falling into their prey again because such people never change. Instead, they manipulate or fake change to get you back.
Once you get back to them, they will feel more powered and try to take full control over your feelings.
They Might Hurt You in Different Ways
When they are in anger, they may say hurtful things, which will make you question yourself and develop feelings of inferiority complex in you. It won’t be a surprise if an angry and slightly narcissistic person says that they never loved you or cheated on you even if they didn’t.
They may threaten to spread photos online or tell your secrets to other people. But you don’t have to worry. They are doing all this because of the ignorance they are experiencing.
You have to stay cool at this stage. No matter what the narcissist is saying or taking steps to scare you, you have to keep your cool.
Don’t lose your temper because it won’t bring positive results. If it gets worse for you, the best thing to do is avoid them. Block them on social media, avoid the places they visit frequently, and try your best to stay away from them.
Staying away from them is beneficial to you. You have the right to stop them from harassing or bullying you before you experience anxiety or depression. So, take all precautionary measures to keep yourself safe from them.
They May Spread Rumors About You
With passing time, the narcissist might feel hopeless and start questioning themselves. They may leave you alone, but they want to get in touch with you. They may still be stalking you on social media or sending you a friend request from unfamiliar accounts. So, don’t accept requests from unknown people.
They may also start spreading rumors about you because spreading rumors is another way of getting your attention. When you respond to the rumors, they will get your attention.
Narcissists love to get reactions. As soon as you give them, you handle your power to them, and this way, they find an opportunity to speak against you. So, the best thing to do is ignore them. Avoid giving any reaction. Neither positive nor negative.
At this stage, you have to stay strong and calm. Don’t lose your cool. You can involve their friends or family members and let them know about the issues you are experiencing because of them. They may help you in getting out of this situation.
Can Narcissists Change? If Yes, How to Know?
Change is a gradual process. Firstly, most of the narcissist doesn’t want to change, and even if they intend to do, it takes a lot more time. When you feel that your narcissistic partner has identified his personality traits and is looking for a change, you should help them.
The best way to identify his change is to observe when he is consistent in doing what he says. You might have heard the famous saying;
Actions Speak Louder Than Words
So, make sure their actions are in complete synchronization with their words. But you have to bear this thing in mind that change will take time. So, if you plan to reunite with a narcissist, give them time to work on themselves. Do not rush. Instead, show patience. During this time, maintain distance from them to avoid additional heartbreak.
When Should You Stop Ignoring A Narcissist?
Well, the most straightforward but harsh answer to this question is never to stop ignoring a narcissist. Narcissists are incredibly manipulative. So, you have to be very careful while staying in their company.
However, you can stop ignoring them when you are 100% sure that their personality traits have changed, and their insecurities have been resolved.
Test them in every situation. Even if you feel that they have changed, don’t open all the doors for them instantly. Take your time to test the waters. Keep them with you for a probation period and let their actions speak.
If you feel they have improved and are trying to depict the best version of themselves, then you can get attached to them again. However, lower down your expectations; otherwise, you might get hurt again.
Getting into a relationship with a narcissist is never easy. Narcissists are the best manipulators and will never let you feel happy and satisfied. You might put sincere efforts into creating a strong bond with them, but they might dump you at any stage for no reason.
The best way to deal with narcissists is by ignoring them. Distancing yourself from them is the best thing to do as it will bring peace, happiness, and satisfaction to your life. So, don’t waste your energy and emotions on such people. Rather stay away from them for your peace and prosperity.
Your ignorance might hurt them, and they would wish to come back in your life. But never open the doors for them until you are `100% sure that they have changed their habits and won’t repeat the same mistakes.